Sickness has Struck the Barger Household

So last Friday, I woke up feeling horrible. I had a migraine, chills, fever, nauseous. The whole nine yards. I was super close to trying to find someone to take care of the boys, but I decided I would just push through. The boys still nap, so I was dying to make it to nap time. Fast forward to Sunday, Branson started running a fever and did for a couple days. Then comes Monday night, Daniel came home running a fever. He has been home from work for 2 days sick with a fever, chills, nausea and muscle pain. Needless to say it has been rough in this house since Friday. Jackson has not caught it yet, and I hope that he doesn't. Even though Jackson is super cuddly when he is sick.
There has not been a lot that has happened in the last week. It has been a laid back week. We have watched a lot of movies which has been super nice. We introduced the boys to the little mermaid. Of course, they kept telling mom to stop as I am singing the whole thing. haha.

So my aunt texted me this week and told me that my cousin's all star cheer team is hiring coaches. If there is anything I miss the most, it is working. I am not the best housekeeper. I would rather be working, but at least I get to stay home and raise my kiddos. One of the best times of my life would have to be when I was coaching the last time. I got to spend lots of time with my cousins. I got to meet tons of awesome people. I love coaching. I was able to travel a little bit. I was expecting the boys. I had so much to look forward to. I loved every minute of it. I sure do miss it. I hate that I do not get to do it anymore. I am still not reliable. Maybe at some point I will be able to coach again. We shall see.

And my sister helped there towards the end. We had so much fun together.

Now I get to cuddle my two little guys and watch a ton of Frozen, Sing, and Moana. Although I love coaching and working, I wouldn't trade being able to stay home with my little guys for the world. I know there are so many people that would dream to be able to stay at home with their kiddos, and I am beyond thankful that I get to do that. Parenting is definitely the hardest yet most rewarding jobs ever. I cannot get my phone to send pictures today, so I don't have any pictures of my little guys today. Hopefully next week it will work. I had some funny pictures, but they will have to wait.

I am seriously so blessed. Sometimes I get caught up in life. Then, I get to looking around and seeing all my blessings. No matter how difficult life can be, I am beyond blessed with far more than I deserve. I am so grateful for all my blessings.

I will just leave it at that. You never know who is watching you or being inspired by your struggles. Stay positive and know that God has a reason for everything.

Twin life at it's finest

So... a little medical update real quick. Last week was my first week doing my fluids at home. The place that delivered all my supplies brought me a pump. Well for the last year and a half, I have just ran by gravity. Meaning there is no pump, we just hang the bag and let it flow. It normally takes about 1-2 hours to finish each bag. With this dumb pump is was going to take 10 hours per bag! I get 2 bags. I would be hooked up for 20 hours! With my medical background, I know how to work a pump, so I go in to try to change the flow rate. Of course, there is a code, so I call the place. They give me the code. I up it to 500ml/hour, so it would still take 2 hours per bag. I mean, that is much better than 10. Then a nice little note comes up saying the line is too small to run it that quick. Lovely, so I keep lowering it to find the fastest rate I could send it through. It ended up being 4 hours per bag. I mean, still better than 10 hours per bag, but I do have 2 toddlers that need their momma. I cannot stay locked in my room for 8 hours every week. I had to stick it out last week, but I was determined to get rid of that stupid pump by this week. I just needed regular tubing instead of the tubing that could only be used with the pump. Well after talking to the doctor she had sent an order to the company for the regular tubing. I talked to the company and they were supposed to call and set up a time for delivery. Fast forward to yesterday, I still had no call, so I called them. The lady tried to tell me that running at 100ml/hr will be faster than gravity. I have only been doing this for a year and a half, and I know that is not true. So I told her that. She then said, "okay" in the most sarcastic tone on voice. It made me so mad. I don't claim to have a lot of knowledge in things, but when it comes to my own medical issues and treatment, I have a lot of knowledge. Well, the tubing got delivered around 3:30 yesterday, and today I am hooked up and flowing quickly.

So after getting tons of supplies this is what is looked like. A mess. I had needles and tons of fluid and  stuff that is not toddler safe. I then went searching for something lockable to hold everything.

Then came sally's beauty supply. This little thing was 50% off last week. Yay! It holds everything perfectly. It locks, so it keeps little hands out of it.

On to the twin cuteness!

When people think of twins, they think of the messes, trouble and fighting. That is majority of my life. "Don't hit your brother" " Don't bite your brother" "That is not nice" "Tell your brother your sorry" "please don't spill that" I say this stuff regularly, but then I get cuteness like this. 

Jackson

Branson

Everything is about daddy. This day the boys were so excited to wear their "daddy shirt." If we pass any truck or tractor, it is daddy's. Even the shower is daddy's. P.S. please excuse my messy house in the background of all the pictures. I do have two toddlers. 

So I am having a hard time thinking of funny stories of my kiddos even though I seriously laugh so hard everyday at them. I do have a funny story from yesterday. We were sitting in the truck and Daniel showed me pictures of his job from yesterday. The boys of course want to see the picture, so Daniel showed them the picture. Jackson said, "Oh my gosh." I seriously laughed so much. It was hilarious, and totally caught me off guard.

Oh something else. So we have a piano and keep some papers in the bench of it. The boys take the papers out of it and pass one around to everyone. They then go to the piano and play and sing. They think the papers are song lyrics. If you don't sing, they look at you like,"what are you doing? read the words" It is hilarious.

So this is a gross story, sorry aunt karen. So Branson is obsessed with washing his hands or water in general. It drives me crazy. So the other day Branson decided to stick his hand in his poopy pull up, so he could wash his hands. I mean that is disgusting. He literally would stay in the bathtub all day acting like shamu if I let him. 

Life with boys is pretty disgusting. Yesterday, Branson was picking his nose. I told him to stop, and he told me he eats his boogers in the truck. yuck.

So Jackson is pretty much potty trained, but he cannot aim at all. One day, Branson decided to stand next to him after I told him to move. Yep, what you are thinking actually happened. Jackson peed all over Branson. Into the tub they went, which may have been Branson's plan all along. haha. "If bubby pees on me, I can take a bath." 

Hopefully I will remember some not so gross stories next time. haha. Being a mom of two boys is defiantly not for the faint of heart. 

Although my life is nuts and sometimes I feel like I have reached my limit, my boys are still the greatest gift God has ever given me. I hope I can teach them to be loving husbands and fathers someday. Most importantly, I hope they grow up to be God fearing men. 

So Much Has Happened

So here I am 2 years later deciding to start blogging again. I am not going to lie, I have missed it. So much has happened in the last 2 years. First things first, I have the best kids ever. The boys are adorable, funny, rotten, and crazy. My life is insane, but I wouldn't have it any other way.

This was taken last fall. Yep they basically are the cutest.

I seriously have some of the best stories. Twin life is nuts! I am going to try to blog once a week while getting infusions, so I am sure I will have tons of funny stories to tell you.

Now to the medical part. I have been diagnosed with Elher's Danlos Syndrome. It is a connective tissue disorder that causes all my symptoms. Yay for answers! However there is no cure, but we can find medications and treatments to help the symptoms. One of them being, getting saline infusions. For the last year and a half, I have been going to Johnson Memorial Hospital to get infusions once a week. I get 2 bags of fluids currently. For the last month, I have been trained to do them on my own! I am currently sitting in my room, drinking coffee, blogging (obviously), and getting infusions. It is definitely an answered prayer considering I still cannot drive. I take a ton of medications, but after a horrible year last year, I feel like we finally have a good medication regimen. Yay for more answers! I cannot thank God enough for my momma that has fought for answers since day one. Without her, I definitely would not be able to even function.

In other news, I got approved for a service dog! I am super excited for this. I am not sure exactly when I will get it considering it is a long process, but it is going to be an answered prayer. I don't like to show my struggles on a daily basis, but somedays are really hard. I cannot do anything without feeling light headed. I feel like all I can do is lay down somedays. Thank God for a wonderful family that helps me with my boys whenever I need it. My service dog will be almost like another set of hands. It can help me pick up stuff off the ground if I drop it. It will be able to go to the fridge to get me a water or gatorade when I am feeling bad. Most importantly, it can call for  help if I was to pass out or have a seizure. My hope is that it will be able to sense both of those thing, so I can drive again. They cannot train a dog to be able to sense seizures, but many of them are so aware of what is going on, they are able to sense it. It sounds silly to say God is going to send me a dog, but I truly believe He will. He knows my needs, and I have no doubt He will provide it. I will definitely keep you updated on my service doggy. Oh yeah, a lot of people want to know what type of dog it will be. It will be either a lab, golden retriever, or a golden retriever/lab mix! My family is all super excited. Except for my great grandma, I am kind of curious on what she will think when I bring this dog everywhere. haha.

Back to life, sorry I am always scatter brained, so be prepared. In A little over 5 weeks, my family is going on a 7 day cruise. Our little fellas will be staying with grandparents while momma and daddy enjoy one last vacation without the kiddos. Although, I know I am going to miss them dearly, Daniel and I are so excited. The cruise is the reason I wanted to learn how to do my own infusions. They make me feel so much better, and I really wanted to be able to enjoy my trip. My mom has a suite with a balcony, so I won't mind sitting outside looking at the ocean while getting fluids. I may even order room service. haha. I am so excited. 

After not feeling well for a year, I am finally trying to focus on myself. I joined Weight Watchers, because I absolutely hate the way I look. I have completely stopped caring for far too long. I am down 19 lbs! woohoo! I still have a long way to go, but I am so glad to be doing something for myself. It makes me a better momma. When momma's happy everyone's happy. :)

I will have so much more to tell you, I am sure, but for now, this is it. Thanks so much for reading. Next week, I am hoping to do a twin story blog. It should keep you laughing. I promise I won't constantly talk about my illness, I am not that kind of girl, but I do know many people have questions, so if you have any please let me know. I will answer them the best I can. Love you all.

If this isn't true, I don't know what is.

Sometimes, I do not know the purpose in my life, but I know God has big plans for me. I take the hardships as they come, and even if my life is raising children and being a wife, to me that is an extraordinary destiny. It is what many women long for, and I am blessed to have it. I may not be able to be a doctor, but I am Jackson and Branson's mommy and to me that is extraordinary.

There was a time in my life that my days were dark. It was really hard on me. I chose to trust in the Lord, because I felt like I had nothing else to lean on. I feel like He did both of those things. He comforted me as I fell, but He also taught me how to overcome it and become better than I ever thought I could be.